The Bachelor
by triplewash0uts
Summary: What happens when you put the Love Hina girls and characters from other anime in The Bachelor? Expect some chaos and havoc!


Disclaimer: All these characters are not ours!!!  
  
What happens when you put the Love Hina girls together to join the popular reality show, 'The Bachelor'? Havoc and chaos. Experience a whole new 'Bachelor', anime style.  
  
This fic is written by 3 bored bakas: na-no-da, Fr0zEn-h@nA and CamoLang  
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The casts:  
  
Bachelor: Akagi Takenori [Slam Dunk]  
  
Contestants:  
Naru Narusegawa [Love Hina]  
Mitsune Konno [Love Hina]  
Shinobu Maehara [Love Hina]  
Mutsumi Otohime [Love Hina]  
Ayako [Slam Dunk]  
Kaolla Su [Love Hina]  
Motoko Aoyama [Love Hina]  
Haruka [Love Hina]  
Shuichi Shindo [Gravitation]  
Pinki Wakabe [OC]  
  
Hosted by: Sakuragi Hanamichi [Slam Dunk]  
  
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Day 1  
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Akagi meets the girls for the first time. [Note: Akagi is 193cm] All the girls had to look up. Akagi had to look down. *Doh* Naru thought that Akagi looked at her breast but she controlled her urge to punch him as Akagi is not Keitaro. ^0^  
  
Haruka offers Akagi her Marlboro ciggies but Akagi refuses as he is a sportsman. Kaolla immediately starts to cling onto Akagi but she couldn't reach his shoulders, so she clung onto his waist.  
  
Shuichi wonders what he's doing here. He misses Yuki a lot. Mutsumi offers Akagi her watermelons in hope that he will favour her but end up tripping on them. Akagi, being the gentleman, broke her fall. He panicked as he couldn't find her pulse but Mutsumi revived. Akagi made a mental not to give her the rose first, as he thought that she would not be able to last the entire ceremony, considering her weak health.  
  
Next, Ayako arrived. Akagi is shocked to see her. He didn't know that Ayako is THAT desperate for a husband. ^-^ Ayako then took out her whistle and ordered Akagi to do a lay up shot! Turns out that Ayako had lost her mind, she got hit on the head by a basketball. Ayako then started clinging onto Akagi's arm, hoping he would choose her. [Akagi now has Su around his waist and Ayako on his arm…]  
  
Mitsune Konno [Kit, for short] starts to flirt with Akagi. She takes his other arm and places it on her breasts. She had forgotten that Akagi is not like Keitaro!! Akagi, feeling embarrassed shakes away all the girls. Ayako fell on her head and recovered, Su landed on Mutsumi's watermelons. He sees Motoko a distant away and was attracted by her long black hair and lone attitude [plus she doesn't cling onto him!]. Su doesn't mind and eats her bananas.  
  
Akagi continues to stare at Motoko's hair and suddenly realised something moving. She has head lice!! *Aaah!* Totally turned off by the thing in her hair he looked around, hoping there are other more down-to-earth girls. Pinki suddenly entered, snapping Akagi out of his reverie. "Ha?! So big ah?! Dowwaaan!!"   
  
Akagi, now exasperated took a seat on his armchair, only to realise that Shuichi was there. Shuichi, obviously sleepwalking, got up and started mumbling, "Yuki... come to me..." and went up to Akagi and gave him a French kiss. Akagi got an erection and wet his pants. O.o [Oro? Shafa-chan! This is supposed to be G- rated!!]  
  
The host for the show is non other than... Sakuragi Hanamichi! *Yay* All the girls/girls-wannabe sat down after Akagi changed his pants. 1, 2, 3... 7, 8, 9... wait a minute! Where's Shinobu? However, nobody was concerned. Su was too busy biting Motoko, Shuichi is standing frozen and Kit is drunk after drinking everybody's wine. Pinki is complaining, "Aiyah! So hot!" Where's Shinobu? She's actually...   
  
*Smack!* The camera is pushed aside and focused on Sakuragi. *Sakuragi's tensai laugh* "Welcome to the Bachelor, featuring Gori... *ahem* Akagi-senpai [eww...] *zooms to Akagi* Lucky, lucky!! Gori, I mean, Akagi has 7 [Sakuragi can't count, remember] girls with him. Heehee. *Nudge Akagi * By the way, how's Haruko? Is she still single?"  
  
Akagi wanted to punch Sakuragi's head, but he stopped himself, as it would seem un-gentlemanly. ^0^  
  
A search party went on to search for Shinobu. They found her in the toilet. Apparently, she had baked a cake for Akagi. However, after she had tasted it, she had to visit the toilet! Good thing Akagi didn't eat it. ^-^  
  
Finally, all the 10 contestants [I can't call them girls...] are there. They mingle and chat. *Ooh!* It's time for the rose ceremony! Only 7 roses?! Who will Akagi choose?   
  
Akagi stood up. He cleared his throat. He turned to pick up a rose... "Eh? Where are they?!"  
  
Under the table, Su was gorging down the roses. Akagi was horrified and confused. He didn't know who to give the roses to, now with Su eating all of them up.  
  
Sakuragi zooms in front of the camera. *Sakuragi's tensai laugh* "We shall now go for a short break and be right back."  
  
"Ladies and gentlemen, we are now rose-less. What to do?" Sakuragi muttered.   
  
Kit brightens. "A-ha! Let's use Sakuragi's hair for a rose since it's the same colour!"  
  
*Hee* Alright... *Ow!* Seven pieces of Sakuragi's hair are now on the table. Who will Akagi choose? [Audience: aw! Shut up and choose NOW!]  
  
As we all know, Akagi planned to give the first rose... erm... hair to Mutsumi. But will he? Akagi, with the hair between his fingers went up to Motoko and stammered, "Wwwwill... you... erm... accept this rose? No! Erm... nose? Ahh! I mean, hair! Will you?" Motoko, shocked but flattered, said, "Yes, I do."  
  
Second 'hair' is for... Su? Akagi asked, "Will you accept this hair?"  
  
Su blinked and replied, "Is it edible?" *glompz* [everyone faints] "Yes!" she said and hugged Akagi.  
  
Third hair is for Naru. Akagi: "Will you accept this hair?"  
  
Naru: "yes..." However, in Naru's mind, she thought, "He probably picked me as he was ogling at my breasts..."  
  
Fourth rose... wait... hair! Akagi picked it up. "Shinobu… will you accept this hair?"   
  
Shinobu: "Er... okay?" In Shinobu's mind, she was wishing that it had been Urashima-senpai who had asked her.  
  
Ok. Fifth hair. "Will you accept this hair?" Akagi asked. "Erm… oh no! Are you alright?" However, she only stared back at Akagi with her dazed look.   
  
Everyone: "Oh no! She's so happy she's gone to heaven!" Yup. It's Mutsumi.  
  
Only two hairs left. Akagi scanned the remaining contestants. Finally, he said, "Mitsune..." Kit dashed to his side and said, "YES!" even before Akagi had finished asking. "I have always wanted to marry a rich man..." Kitsune exclaimed.  
  
Last hair. Only Shuichi, Ayako, Haruka and Pinki are left. Who will he choose?  
  
SUSPENSE MUSIC  
  
MORE SUSPENSE MUSIC  
  
JENG JENG JENG  
  
"Pinki..." PINKI?! God! Is Akagi blind or BLIND?! "Will you accept this rose?"  
Pinki: "Okay-lah... can-lah..." She held the hair gingerly between her fingers. "Ee... so dirty..."  
  
Akagi apologizes to those who were not chosen. They weren't chosen as:  
  
Shuichi is a guy and Akagi is straight. *Doh* why would he join The Bachelor in the first place?  
  
Haruka smoked and Akagi is a sportsman. Akagi would be a passive smoker.  
  
Akagi knows Ayako and only sees her as a friend. [Ryota watching at home: thank goodness Akagi didn't choose Aya-chan. Aya-chan is mine!" best of luck, Ryota!]  
END OF DAY 1  
  
Mr Director started nodding and saying good job to everyone. Sakuragi looks around to see if Haruko is there to support her brother. She wasn't. *Aww* 


End file.
